By MARIA SERMERSHEIM
MEDITATIONE IGNIS
When I visited Lourdes over the summer, my friend Katherine and I were hoping and expecting to run into some people we knew. We were on constant alert to catch a glimpse of a familiar face or hear an American accent in the sea of languages. After some significant time spent searching for familiarity, we were surprised by the small number of fellow English-speakers around us. In the end, we were simply excited to hear our native tongue, even if it wasn’t spoken by the friends we were hoping to encounter.
Twice during this vigilance for friends and English-speakers, I heard some men laugh heartily, and I felt a thrill of recognition, so I thought: is that an American laugh? I had hope that we would be able to communicate, hope that we could make a connection because I recognized their laugh! Shortly afterwards, though, we heard them speak a different language, and those hopes of English communication were dashed. But other hopes were raised in their wake: like the hope that I still understood them because laughter is a universal language.
We express sorrow and joy in many different ways among cultures and individuals, but the purest expressions of laughter and tears are intelligible to everyone. We don’t always need to speak the same language in order to understand each other, and that is incredibly encouraging because the desire for true understanding is deeply human and often fraught with difficulty. Reaching understanding with others is what all of communication and growing in relationships aims to do! And yet words are not always the easiest avenue. Caryll Houselander, in her excellent book “The Reed of God,” emphasizes that explanations are not the most effective way to understanding. Instead, “love will be a bridge over which, at last, in God’s time, we shall cross to a better understanding,” while explanations only sometimes clarify and “seldom heal.”
Between any two people, love is the bridge, and laughter is part of it. Houselander continues with her reflection that, for growing in relationships and especially when making amends, that bridge of love “will have to be the love of humility; that is, love informed by humility—long-suffering, patient, and humorous. If we realize that we are a little absurd, such love will come more easily.” What a gift! In many ways and many situations—whether navigating tough times with friends or meeting strangers around the world—understanding is possible because laughter is a language I understand.
May we all remember this commonality and appeal to our universal language of laughter and love as we seek better understanding, truer friendship, and purer love of the Lord who is Love Himself.