By Andrea Goebel
God’s Way
We’d been rocking in the dark for a while, but my littlest one just wasn’t settling down to sleep. As I grew weary and began wondering just how long this bedtime routine would take, he lifted his head off my shoulder, leaned back, and looked at me. He grinned and cooed in greeting.
“Do you think I have nothing better to do than sit here and rock you forever?” I asked internally as I thought of all the productive things I could be doing elsewhere.
As soon as I let myself think those words, a wave of chastisement washed over me.
Of course: I didn’t have anything better to do than taking care of my child who needed me. I had to humble myself, again, as I had so many other days when I confused my wants with my children’s needs. As much as I thought I needed to be elsewhere, God was calling me here.
In the Bible, we read the story of Jonah, God’s call for him, and his response: “The word of the Lord came to Jonah, son of Amittai: ‘Set out for the great cityof Nineveh, and preach against it; for their wickedness has come before me.’ But Jonah made ready to flee to Tarshish, away from the Lord” (Jonah 1:1-3).
When God called, Jonah deliberately boarded a ship that would take him away from his heavenly father. I wonder how often we flee when we hear God direct us to follow a specific path.
Sometimes, I shy away from God’s call out of fear of the unknown. I don’t always know where his path leads, so I mistakenly believe I’m better off trusting my own ways.
Other times, I stray because I fear what following God will cost me. I don’t like traveling on the difficult path of faith and obedience, so I choose the easy route and follow the path of least resistance.
Still other times, I choose not to obey God because I’m too prideful: I just want to have my own way and do what I want to do, and I don’t like anyone, even God, telling me otherwise. So, I ignore what I know my intuition tells me to do, and I let pride and self-reliance guide the way.
In all three situations, I quickly realize what my sin of disobedience costs me: unnecessary conflict, suffering and separation from God.
Jonah realizes the consequences of his disobedience when a violent storm threatens to capsize the boat he has boarded, and he tells his shipmates to throw him overboard so the storm will abate (1:12). Most of us are familiar with the next part of his story, when he ends up in the belly of a whale for three days. However, it was only as an adult that I paid attention to what happened while he was inside the whale: “Jonah prayed to the Lord, his God, from the belly of the fish” (2:2).
How quickly do I pray and repent when I do wrong? How quickly do I return to my heavenly Father, sing his praises, and beg his forgiveness?
Thankfully, we have a loving Father who gives us second chances. The whale spit Jonah out onto dry land, and when God called to him a second time, he obeyed: “So Jonah set out for Nineveh, in accord with the word of the Lord” (3:3).
Like Jonah, I, too, have spent time running away from God. However, also like Jonah, I try to obey the next time I hear God’s voice. If there is any silver lining in learning from our sins, it is this: when we return to God and follow him with our whole heart, we experience just how fulfilling it is to walk in communion with him.
A few weeks after my disgruntled response to my child’s desire for quality time together before bed, we sat together in his room, yet again rocking in the dark. This time, he fell asleep quickly, and as he lay in my arms, I gazed at my precious child. I marveled at his plump cheeks, curly hair and long lashes. I felt his warmth and his weight snuggled against me, and I relished this time we shared. This time, when God called me to care for my son’s needs, I responded with a humble heart. This time, I knew where I belonged.